I didn't mean to lose weight. It just sort of happened.
One Saturday I got to wondering if there were an app for tracking how much you eat. Silly question...there's an app for everything! I wasn't planning to use it, mind you...I didn't need it, because I was eating just fine, thank you very much...but I was curious.
Just for fun, I downloaded a calorie-counting app with a simple user interface and cute little food icons. I plugged in the requested information about my age, weight, and height and randomly chose a weight loss goal, just to play along.
I recorded the eggroll I'd had for lunch. Bing! Up popped the nutrition information, including calorie count. Pleased with how easy and rather fun that had been, I entered the rest of the day's food. I probably wouldn't keep up with the record-keeping, but it couldn't hurt to do it for a day or two.
That evening I received an email. From my app. It told me that if I could keep recording my food for three days, my chances of losing weight would triple. I do like a challenge. Three days? I could do that.
Turns out three days wasn't nearly as easy as I thought. Recording what I was eating made me realize that maybe my habits weren't so great after all. It didn't feel good, seeing evidence of my weakness. But after my second day my app sent me another email, congratulating me on my efforts and cheering me on for tomorrow.
I did make it those first three days. A woo-hoo message and a blue electronic badge were my reward for recording my food intake, along with another bit of encouragement: don't give up. Not yet.
I noticed pretty quickly that my app wasn't demanding that I change my eating habits. It simply gave me a safe place to honestly record the decisions I was making each day. As I began to let go of my fear of admitting my bad choices, it became easier and easier to make good ones.
It's been 95 days, according to my app, since I started logging my daily food. In those three months I've lost 31 pounds and three clothing sizes. I've tried to exercise a little more, mostly by taking longer walks with the dog, but mostly the change has been as simple as writing down what I ate, with an electronic device to cheer me on.
I always thought weight loss would be hard. Too hard for me. I thought it was something other people did. So I never tried. Now, with a spring in my step that wasn't there 31 pounds ago, I can't help wondering...why did I wait so long?
........
I haven't tried being a person who doesn't hold grudges. Or a person who chooses to always see the best in those around me. I haven't tried reading my Bible every day...well, I did try, but when I failed I gave up and haven't tried again.
I haven't tried confidently laying my biggest worries in God's hands. Or my greatest shame. I haven't tried living each day with a truly thankful heart.
I can't help wondering...what am I waiting for?
Wouldn't it be fun, three months from now, to think about all the weight of hurt or worry I've left behind me? Wouldn't it feel fantastic to look at the number of days I've lived in gratitude, or to know I've dropped several sizes of pride and self-absorption?
I think back to what made the difference, what finally got me to get off my rump and change the way I ate. I have to be honest...it wasn't me. If it were contingent on nothing but my willpower, I could have never made the change in myself, no matter how strong I like to think I am.
What made the difference was that silly little app, cheering me on, holding me accountable, being on my side. It was just what I needed.
If it were up to us, nothing would ever change. We're not strong enough to be who we want to be, not all on our own.
But we're not on our own. More than any electronic gadget could ever promise, we have a faithful Creator offering encouragement for our every moment. Cheering us on. Holding us accountable. Being on our side. Sending much more than an email - sending His very Son, a message of unconditional love, allowing us to see ourselves as the forgiven and daily-made-new people God has re-created us to be through Jesus' death and resurrection.
No need to download; He's already there. Right there, ready to hear your truths. Eager to encourage, challenge, equip, and forgive.
So...what are you waiting for?
First published in The Alpena News on June 24, 2017.
