Sunday, May 29, 2022

Words we don’t say

The average American English-speaking adult only uses about 10% of the at least 200,000 words that make up their language, according to a random sampling of internet experts who sound like they know what they’re talking about.

That leaves a heck of a lot of unused words floating around out there, never getting the love they deserve.

Lexico.com — a language website drawing from well-respected dictionary sources — offers a list of weird and wonderful words that rarely see the light of day.

In a quick dip into the list, I learned, to my delight, that I could be using the word “keek,” which means to peep surreptitiously.

Ain’t that great?

The list also taught me that I am a mouse potato who raised three screenagers.

If someone tells me I look peely-wally, I can say there’s no need to kick up bobsy-die or get into a fankle about it.

I worry that I’m a blatherskite, but at least I’m not a snollygoster, and, if I’m a hoddy-noddy, I certainly hope someone tells me so I can try to do better.

And I definitely expect a wayzgoose from my employer this summer.

So many lovely words that never get said — famulus, spaghettification, guddle, even floccinaucinihilipilification, although learning to pronounce that one would probably prove worthless.

I can’t help feeling a little sorry for all those words that never pass my lips because I don’t know them.

Other words, on the other hand, I choose to exclude, because using them doesn’t feel right.

For example, I decided a while back to limit my use of words like “crazy” or “insane.”

A lot of people struggle with mental illness, and my word choice doesn't need to imply that there’s something wrong with that.

I try not to use words that turn intimate body parts into insults, and I don’t use as expletives phrases that portray sex as an act of violence or aggression.

Recently, I learned that a word I considered harmless is seen as derogatory by some people.

I don’t want someone to hurt because of what I say, so I don’t use that word anymore.

Heck, I’ve got a couple hundred thousand other words I could use, instead.

Alongside the words I don’t know and the ones I prefer to avoid are the words I should use but don’t.

It’s astonishing, really, how words you need to say can get stuck in the throat and won’t come out.

Please.

Thank you.

I’m sorry.

I forgive you.

Please help me.

Tell me how I can help.

I love you.

I love you, too.

Blockaded by fear or anger or stubbornness, the words we don’t say can stand between us like a wall — one that could instantly fall if only we opened our mouths to speak.

I’m not sure how many words are in God’s vocabulary.

I do know He talks to me.

He says quite a bit, calmly admonishing when I do something I oughtn’t, whispering hope when skies grow dark, murmuring comfort when I lay my head on His shoulder and weep.

Some words, though, He doesn't say.

I reject you.

You are unforgivable.

I don’t want you.

You are not mine.

I know my unworthiness to be loved by One who sees my insides, knows the scars and divots of my heart and the wayward wanderings of my mind.

I struggle to see the good in me, but, good golly, I sure can see the not-good, and I know God shouldn’t want me.

I’m not good enough.

That’s why His Child, the One who WAS good enough, hung on a tree.

Because God had words He didn’t want to say.

He didn’t want to reject me — reject you — so He rejected His Son, and then, death defeated, scooped Him back up again to be my brother.

We keep on being not good enough, keep pushing each other away and stubbornly stomping about, refusing to speak words of love and grace to one another.

But, because of Jesus, God keeps on holding out His arms to us, smashing through walls, calling us His.

You will never be not wanted by God.

Never.

Those are words He simply doesn’t say.

First published in The Alpena News on May 28, 2022.